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PART III -Why alpha males and alpha females tend to lock horns


alpha female


 by Joseph Ernest  June 22, 2011 


Newscast Media HOUSTON, Texas -- Just as women screen or pre-qualify every man they meet, it is important for men to screen women too, because one bad relationship can ruin your entire life.  It would be counter-productive to get involved with a woman who has just exited a long term relationship, because it takes years before such a woman receives closure, especially if she was betrayed. 


Attempting to mend a broken heart

Because men naturally are prone to fixing things when they are broken, there are certain men who always seem to gravitate toward women  who are emotionally wounded.  Unlike a physical wound that heals when left alone, an emotional wound is different.  The more it is ignored, the worse it becomes.  Even psychotherapists and psychiatrists resort to prescribing medications that simply treat the symptoms instead of addressing the causes.

When a woman has been betrayed, it is almost impossible for the trust to be restored.  Even after she meets a new guy, she will always harbor a certain level of distrust and suspicion based on her past experiences, that's why it is important to enter a relationship with a woman who is whole or one who has received closure from a past relationship.  Never try to mend a broken heart, because frankly, some broken hearts can never mend. 

If a man insists on entering a relationship with a woman who still hasn't yet received closure from a past betrayal, such a man will have to walk on egg-shells most of the time because the woman might misconstrue his actions or inactions or jump to unsubstantiated conclusions.  Behavioral scientists David, Stanley and Derald Weng refer to this as arbitrary inference, in their book Understanding Abnormal Behavior.  Arbitrary inference is where a person draws erroneous conclusions based on available evidence.  They are apparently unwilling or unable to see other more probable explanations.  Eventually this will start to take a toll on the relationship and both parties will become emotionally drained.

The alpha and beta females

Throughout my investigative research, I came across five groups of individuals: The alpha male, beta male, the nomad, the alpha female and beta female.  An alpha male is a manly man who has confidence in self and won't hesitate to take the lead.  Beta males tend to be spoilers and often play the role of a Judas.  They also exhibit signs of being needy and clingy because their social skills are underdeveloped. Beta males are also saboteurs who use every opportunity they get to sabotage others, whether it is in the business world or in relationships.  A nomad is a male who once was alpha but lost his glory.  When a man allows his identity to be defined by the things he owns or the company he works for or his job title, and loses it all, such a man, more often than not, will also lose his self-worth and become a nomad.  Unlike beta males who pretend to be friendly in your presence yet stab you in the back in your absence, nomads are driven by jealousy and display it openly.

Some men, despite exuding an aura of confidence, can't stand to see another man succeed in life.  If they've worked hard for decades to get to where they are, and someone else comes along who is a fast learner and is accomplishing honors or attention at a much faster rate, a nomad will perceive such a man as a threat.  They never want to give credit where credit is due because it wounds their egos to acknowledge someone else's efforts.  They start out as alpha males, but as their self-worth erodes gradually, so do the alpha traits they once possessed. Nomads and beta males have weak creative imagination and lack originality in what they do.  As such, they both lack authenticity, but can instantly spot an authentic alpha male even without the alpha saying a word. There is nothing as intimidating to a nomad or beta as being in the presence of an alpha male.

Men would rather be respected than be loved


Alpha females are ambitious and high achievers, whose relationships tend to revolve around their careers.  Something that is remarkable about alpha females is that they are naturally drawn to alpha males because they want a man who takes charge, exudes confidence and is just as accomplished as they are.  However, something interesting happens when they start to forge relationships with alpha males.  As I mentioned earlier, since most (not all) alpha females tend to have a hard time separating their leadership role at the workplace from their role in a romantic relationship with an unbalanced alpha male, they tend to experience a mental tug-of-war, because they feel that by being submissive, they are stripping themselves of their femininity.  In the end, the alpha female and the unbalanced alpha male lock horns and one ends up walking away from the relationship.


When an alpha female is in a relationship with a well-balanced alpha male, such relationships last a lifetime, as is evident with powerful political or business families. Such alpha females are fiercely loyal, dependable, devoted and trustworthy, that in most cases the alpha male does not mind letting the woman assert her dominance, because she knows when to switch it off.

According Dr. Kevin Lehman, a family psychologist, "A man would rather be respected than be loved, because when a man is respected, he feels loved."

As for beta females, they tend to be nurturing and aren't afraid to display their emotional side. Alpha males are drawn to them naturally because men are genetically programmed to be rescuers.  However, beta females in most cases are not as dependable or devoted to their men as alpha females, because alphas tend to have a strong sense of self, while most beta females tend to lack the strong self-image that alpha females possess and exude.

It is possible, however, to turn even the most militant alpha female into a submissive beta, however, that topic is beyond the scope of this article.

In the June 2005 edition of GQ magazine, they featured an interview with five American soldiers from the Pennsylvania National Guard, who guarded the former Iraqi dictator Saddam Hussein for almost 300 days.  These soldiers told GQ that during that time, they were able to have some interesting conversations with Saddam.  One of the topics that came up was about women.  Saddam Hussein's advice to these five young soldiers about women was, "You gotta find a good woman.  Not too old, not too young. Not too smart, not too stupid. In the middle."  The old man had figured it out. Continue to Part IV Alpha males >>

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Related articles:

PART I - Alpha males and females tend to lock horns

PART II - Alpha males and females tend to lock horns

PART IV - Alpha males and females tend to lock horns  








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